When I was growing up, I often imagined what my family would look like – you know, once I had a husband and kids of my own.  I pictured a little house on a piece of land, at least two kids, but probably four. Simple things. A fairly common simple life.

The truth is, I think all of us have an innate desire to be part of a family. We want to have people who know us and love us – flaws and all.  Yet, the sad truth is, we can spend so much time searching for what we think family is, that we don’t take the time to appreciate the reality. We look for Hallmark, when the reality is a whole lot grittier than that. So, what does family look like?

Last Friday night, I sat in the midst of a large group of people, all waiting to watch one young man walk across a stage and get his diploma.  That group included my best friend of almost 20 years and her family, my sisters, nieces and nephew, brothers-in-law, an ex-brother-in-law, a sister’s boyfriend, my younger sister’s best friend of over 20 years – who is also one of my closest friends, JD’s dad, stepmom, granny, grandpa, aunt and uncle, step grandpa and his wife, a few people from church, and even a couple of band moms and one of their sons (although they weren’t just there for JD).  I had to smile.

This is real life. Real life sometimes isn’t as simple as a husband and four children. Sometimes real life and real family looks like rows of people, holding up cardboard cutouts of your only child’s face, screaming loudly, as 18 years of love, discipline, and growth culminates in a handshake and diploma.

It looks like heartache and redemption. Like sorrow and joy. It looks like celebrating the fact that no matter how differently life turns out than you once had imagined – in some ways it is sweeter than you ever would have wished for.

This is a beautiful life.