Month: March 2017

“You do you….”

I seem to hear that phrase a lot, and it has a great message – you be who you were intended to be, and I’ll be who I was intended to be and life will be just fine.  Yet, we don’t necessarily always abide by that, do we?

For now, let’s not focus on other people and their opinions, but our opinions of ourselves. You see, you can’t always change how someone feels about you, but I believe you can change how you think about yourself – and that is what is most important. It took me a long time to be okay with the fact that not everyone was going to like me, but once I realized that as long as I liked myself, and was true to who I am, I would be just fine, there was freedom in that. It doesn’t mean I’m flippant with the feelings of others, or intentionally try to be un-likeable, but it does mean that my happiness does not hinge on the fickle opinion of other people. Feelings change – truths do not.

My office is set back off the road. Every so often, I try to get up and walk down to the road to stretch my legs.  After 10 hours sitting in a chair, in a small office, you will feel it at the end of the day if you don’t do something, so I try to make an effort to stretch my legs. Yes, even short legs need to be stretched.  Mostly because my feet don’t touch the ground in my chair.  Ridiculous.  Anyways….I digress.  The property adjacent to ours, at the start of the road, houses a crossfit gym.  Most times when I walk past, I walk right by people flipping tires, running sprints, and man…they. are. killing. it.  KILLING IT. Are they all in the same shape? No, but they are all putting in an effort.

Now, there are those who would look across that chain link fence, and judge each of us. This morning, I had to smile.  You see – they are doing them, and I am doing me. I have done boot camps, half marathons, paleo diets, sprint runs (you can stop laughing now…just because when I say “my feet had wings” it is more like duck wings, and less like eagle wings doesn’t mean it wasn’t sprinting for me), and the list goes on.

But that’s not where I am right now.

Right now, I am focusing on small things that add big value in my life.  And guess what? Both my effort, and the effort of those on the other side of the chain link fence are valid.  I walk by, smile, head high, shoulders back, silently cheer them on – while also silently commending myself for loving myself where I am, and recognizing what I need right now.

Y’all we live in a world of filters, and “best angles”. We live in a world that judges our efforts based on the efforts of the person next to us, without taking into account what the inside looks like. And somehow, we’ve bought into the opinion of others more than the truth of ourselves. So here’s to you…to the person who is flipping tires, and the one who is making an effort to stretch their legs – both doing something to be a little healthier. Here’s to the person who started the day off with a skip in their step, ready to tackle all the challenges – and to the one who realized they needed a day to rest and relax, so they grabbed a book and headed to the couch…or even binged on Netflix. Here’s to the one tracking their food intake all day long in an effort to reach goals, and to the person who is lovingly preparing a carb loaded meal to enjoy with their family. Here’s to the runner that I saw this morning when it was still dark, running down the road fist pumping in the air about something…you made me smile.  But here’s to the person who got the courage to go buy a pair of running shoes, and take them for a walk. <— That takes strength and courage. Here’s to the one who finally bought that goal size bathing suit, but also to the one who is relaxing on the beach just as comfortable in their bathing suit. Here’s to the parent making Pinterest worthy healthy lunches every day, and the one who is making efforts to have an occasional family meal on paper plates – even if it was picked up through a drive-thru.  Y’all are all killing it.  Every. Single. Day.

And I could go on.

Here’s to confidence in this moment.

If nobody else has told you today – you’re valid, and valued.  You’re worth more than you’ll ever know, and your efforts are to be praised. Don’t wait to celebrate who you are. Remind yourself daily of the truth of who that person is, and soon the truth of who you are, will long drown out the opinion of who other people think you are…or should be.

Here is one of my fundamental truths:

Psalms 139:14 – I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Y’all, I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Right now. In this moment. Always.

And you are, too.

We’re killing it!

This is a beautiful life.

 

A couple of weeks ago, I read an article online and the writer was young. She was in her mid-20’s and was getting ready to move to Europe for a job opportunity. In the post she thanked her mom and dad for all their support, and for a just a moment, I wondered what that felt like.  What that looked like. I wondered what it felt like to be mid-20s, nourished under the umbrella of those kind of parents. In all honesty, by mid-20 some of my hardest years to date had already been lived. Actually, I’ll go ahead and say, ALL of my hardest years to date had already been lived. While I enjoyed the article, I found I couldn’t really relate.

Sometimes I run across a picture of myself as a child, and it takes my breath for a second. I look at the girl, with my same blue eyes, and a wide grin, and in a split second I’ll think of all the things that have transpired since then – all the things she didn’t know and some of the things she knew that the picture hid. It can be a bit overwhelming.

But then….

I think about the beauty born out of struggle. I see a picture of me now, and the laugh lines that frame the same wide smile. The crow’s feet that are a visual reminder of a life of joy. The comfort of knowing exactly who I am…and really liking that person. I’m reminded of a heart that is open and understanding to others. A heart that loves fiercely. A life that is beautiful. There are parts of my story I wouldn’t want anyone else to have to go through…but those are the parts that developed a strength and confidence I wouldn’t trade.

That Sunday morning, after I read the article, I stood in the kitchen and my son came out of his room.  He asked me a question, and while I answered him I thought, “I don’t have to wonder what that looks like – I’m looking at it now. I’m standing here talking to a young man who knows exactly what that feels like.”

You see, we don’t all get the same start. Like it or not – it’s true. We don’t all have the same opportunities. But those things don’t have to hold us back. While I’ll never be able to relate to the same experience of the young lady in her mid-20’s, I’ve been blessed to love and offer that to someone else.

And that, y’all, is pretty amazing.

Lord, thank you – even if the little girl in those long ago pictures had no clue where life would lead, You did…and I’m grateful. Beyond words.

This is a beautiful life.