September 2016 – restlesslycontent

The most mundane experiences can make us evaluate – if only we will let them.

I have these two cats, Cheese and Crackers, and to look at them you would think they have never missed a meal, because they haven’t. They are huge. However, I started noticing a trend. They would indicate pretty clearly that they needed food, but when I went to the bowl, I noticed that none of the food on the left side of the bowl had been touched. The right side was empty, but the left was full. I’d fill the right side up and soon it would be empty – and we’d be back at it.

I didn’t think too much of it – anyone who has a cat knows that they change their minds about things and then that’s it. Instead, I emptied out the whole bowl, washed it (thinking maybe something threw them off about the left side), filled both sides back up with food, and turned the bowl around as an experiment. I wanted to see if they would eat out of the left side.

I got up this morning to feed them – and sure enough. The left side was full and the right side was empty. They still won’t eat out of the left side of the bowl – even though prior to last week – when I turned the bowl around – it had been the right side of the bowl. I shook my head, said some things about how silly they were, fed them…..and then had a moment.

I thought – isn’t that we so often do? We search, and cry, and look for something. We find ourselves malcontent with our situations and decide we must need something else. We say things like – “I don’t want to settle” and somehow fail to see what is right in front of our face. Yes, there are times when we need to do something different. There are times when we face the reality that we have allowed certain parts of our life to get stale or we settle for where we are because we are too scared to take a risk, but I’m not talking about those instances. I’m talking about feeling like we are lacking when we already have what we need – whether that be in a relationship or our job or in the words we speak over our life.

Help my eyes be opened to what is in front of me. You see, it’s not really settling for the left side, but instead realizing that where you only see emptiness, the truth is that what you need was right there all along.

This is a beautiful life.

As I sit here, wrapping up the day of JD’s 18th birthday, I can hardly believe the child that once held my hand is the young man who stands before me. With this year being a momentous year, I thought long and hard about what to get him. You see, I wanted to get him something that would last. I wanted to get him something that he would look back on and remember from his 18th birthday. Sooooo…..I got him some work gloves – because you know…it’s time to go to work. hahaha! No, seriously. It was quite funny when he took it out of the bag along with his 40th anniversary Shelton Fireworks t-shirt. Nothing says “you’re 18” like fireworks and work gloves. Woot.

On a serious note, one thing I knew for a while that I wanted to get him was a nice Bible. We have tried to impress upon JD the importance of seeking God at a young age, and now that he is about grown, I felt that it was important to get him a Bible that he could keep with him for years. I went with an interleaved journal Bible because it has a blank page next to each page of scripture for you to journal your thoughts. I prayed about what to write in it. I wanted to leave him a note that he could look back on for years and know my heart. I sat down Sunday night, wrote this out in about five minutes, and decided to go with it – no revisions. I figured if it was what I first thought of, then it was where my heart was.

JD – On your 18th birthday I wanted to get you a gift with meaning – one that would last. I thought about you and all my hopes and dreams for your life – and then I thought about my own life.

My hopes for you include a life well-lived and well-loved. I hope your days of joy are many and your moments of sorry few. I hope you see a need and fill that need. I hope you get up each morning with purpose and lie down each night knowing exactly who you are.

But more than all that combined, I hope you seek God’s will for your life early and often.

You see, son, I cannot guarantee you days without struggle. I cannot guarantee you won’t have heartache. But I can guarantee that if you trust in Him, seek, Him, and turn your eyes to Him in all areas of your life, He will provide for you in ways you cannot begin to imagine now, but will look back on one day with joy and awe at his wonderful plan and great mercy. I know because He has done this for me.

I love you, JD. May all you seek to find in life be found within these pages.

Happy 18th Birthday!

Love Forever,

Mom

Romans 12:12 – Joyful in hope…patient in affliction…faithful in prayer

My job as a mom has always been to try to equip him for his future, and I could think of no better way than to provide him with the thing that has most shaped my life.

I also added to his vinyl collection, and had to laugh when I though about his gifts – they were pretty eclectic. Pensacon tickets, a Bible, albums, and a gift card for hunting boots from me, a new bow and hunting stuff from his dad and Brandy. Pretty eclectic. ha!

Picking out which albums to surprise him with was so fun, and I knew immediately what I was looking for….then, I found Eric Church’s Sinners Like Me and was super excited. It’s one of JD’s favorite albums (and mine, too) and they did not have it on vinyl when I looked at Christmas. I immediately ordered it, along with the Eagles, Journey, and Billy Joel. I found the Queen album I was looking for – and hesitated. Who knew that the only available was an original 1981 vinyl. I was thinking I’d hold off on that one for Christmas. Then, my younger sister reminded me he only turns 18 once, and even offered to pitch in for it. haha! Needless to say, he was super excited when he opened it up tonight.

Happy Birthday, son! Your mom got you a Bible, an album titled Sinners Like Me, and a vintage Queen vinyl for your birthday. It was pretty great.

As we enjoyed his birthday dinner, I couldn’t help but think of how far we have come in the last 18 years. Our lives look nothing like they did then, but the blessings have been many, the changes – while some were difficult – have brought growth and learning, and the days have been filled with love. I’m not sure what more a person can ask for in life.

This is a beautiful life.

Month: September 2016

Settling for the Left Side

Queen, a Bible, and Sinners Like Me